Likely you’ve heard the expression, “feedback is a gift.”  While trite, the purpose of the phrase is to prepare the receiver to be open to the input. The bigger risk in the equation, however, is that important feedback is not even provided. How many times have you wanted to share an observation or a bit of coaching, only to refrain because you don’t want to upset the person or risk offending them? Or perhaps they should just know, given their experience or level? (I see this all the time in the C-Suite)

Here’s a stark truth: you MUST share feedback as leader if you want to achieve your goals. The harder the conversation seems – the more you dread it – the more you must push forward. If you’re a CEO, business unit or function leader, you already know that you don’t actually do much that impacts results on a daily basis. Your team does. How can they know how they are doing if you don’t share your expectations and how they are performing against them? How can they get better if the one person who has the broadest view of their performance does not share what they can do to improve or address derailing behaviors?

Here’s the upside you are missing out on if you don’t have a healthy feedback practice:

• The opportunity to course correct before too many resources are allocated to the wrong priorities or actions
• Helping even a highly experienced executive become aware of a blind spot
• Setting an example that leaders in your organization lean into difficult conversations
• Creating leverage for yourself by teaching others how to solve problems rather than having to do so yourself
• Accelerating and optimizing your own career growth

While feedback is an obligation, this is not a call to abandon the principles of Humane Leadership. Care and compassion are in order. Approaching the conversations with the mindset of a coach versus a disappointed parent is critical. Offer your observations with candor, provide specific suggestions on what the person can do differently going forward, and be prepared to have a dialogue about what specific actions are appropriate. Once you’ve delivered your perspective, be sure to ask, what do you think? You may not know the whole story based on one observation, and if you are the only one talking, the likelihood of behavior change is low.

Feedback IS a gift. But not if you don’t give it. To make sure you are not missing out on an important opportunity, take a few minutes right now to write down the one thing each of your direct reports needs to adjust to deliver their maximum performance over the next six months. Be sure to share that feedback (or reinforce it) in your next 1-on-1 with them.

And while you’re at it, ask them for some feedback on how you can improve as well. Nothing fosters a feedback culture more than a leader who is genuinely open to input as well!

What you can do to improve your overall feedback effectiveness:

1. Timing matters. Don’t wait too long but choose the right situation. While hearing about ways to improve presence or presentation skills would be valuable, providing the feedback after versus in the meeting would be more impactful.
2. Focus more on patterns than one-off observations (unless egregious). Each of us is entitled to an off day.
3. Skip the gratitutous flattery and no need to sugar coat. Share yor feedback or concern directly AND provide data or specific examples to support your point of view. Prepare in advance so you can make a rigorous case and
4. Feeback is not a one-way conversation. Once you have succintly and directly delivered your feedback, pause and ask, “what’s your reaction to that?” and listen to what the other person has to say. The dialogue that follows can further your undertanding of the situation and help create buy-in for the behavior change you are seeking.
5. Contact Us if you would like to learn more about how we help leaders and teams have more honest, productive conversations.